Woke up this morning

I woke up this morning feeling a lot better. My feeling about the election now is “Fine. If this is what they, or at least 51% anyway, wanted, let em have it. Let the country go to hell. See if I care." I didn't have a special, vested interest in seeing Bush defeated. My support for John Kerry was based on what I thought was best for America and the massive corruption and ineptitude that I witnessed in the Bush administration. It wasn't based on wedge issues. I honestly don’t care if gays get married and women can get abortions. I voted on the economy, foreign policy/war, education, and the environment. All four of those are going to get worse, and we’ll see if that is truly okay with those people/voters, you know, so long as there are no gay marriages and abortions. Because I’m betting it won’t be. There WILL be a backlash to all this. Oh sure, there'll be no more abortions or gay marriages, but the economy will continue its downward slide as corporate interests take greater control of the country. There'll be plenty of new military excursions for the increasingly larger number of lower class American kids. The question is, will we survive it? I mean, for me, I am in a somewhat recession-proof line of work, though Bush is very, very bad for education. And I am too old to be drafted to go fight in Iraq or any subsequent wars. So I can probably get by. The trick, I think, is to be as uninformed as 51% of the electorate seems to be. Ignorance is bliss. Seriously, I am tempted to just tune out for a while. It doesn’t matter what I think or what I know until four years from now anyway. Paying attention for the next three years will only serve to make me angry, with no purpose or outlet.

One plus in all this is that I have had lots of stress to burn off this week. I’ve been having awesome runs. Erm, so to speak. Get it? That’s a diarrhea joke. :) I was referring to running, but it sounded like something else! See, I can make jokes again, so I know I’m coming out of my depression. :)

BTW, I know it’s hard, but remember that John Kerry got more votes than any losing Presidential candidate ever has. And this was still a close election, even if it wasn’t AS close as in 2000. It isn't quite the massive blowout that it feels like. Or that it's being portrayed as in the media. Even Bush thinks he has some sort of mandate, which is scary considering not having one before didn't seem to slow him down much.

To emigrate or not to emigrate? Is that really the question?

Because it's certainly been the subject of the last hour of my Internet searching tonight. Yeah, it's Thursday night, party night, and I am simply too unrelentingly morose to be around people. All day today, people kept asking me if I was okay. Apparently I didn't look like it. So I am in my bed, with the lights out, fantasizing about leaving what little I have left in this increasingly frightening (to me, if not 51% of the electorate) country and moving far, far away. Anyway, tonight I find myself really envying my friend Allan. He has dual English-American citizenship. What I wouldn't give for THAT right now.

But while Australia and NewZealand sound awesome, weather-wise, it's Canada that would be easiest country to which to emigrate. But I guess I'll have to consider them all when I begin hunting for my first teaching job starting this June. When I came back to school over four years ago, I was starting a new chapter, if not book, of my life. This coming summer will see the end of that one and the beginning of a new one. Really, I can go anywhere I want, so long as I can speak the language. Which certainly limits things quite a bit. :)

But I still have a lot to do before then. Like finish this awful semester. And do my student teaching. I just met my host teacher today and she is awesome. I was probably not as dynamic as I would have liked to have been, near-crippling depression and all, but she too was grieving the election.

And I really wish people would stop asking me about it, asking me how I feel. I feel like crying, that's how I feel. And every time I manage to forget about it, someone brings it up again. I guess that's my plan: ignore it. Hey, it works for Bush.

...And on a Personal Note...

...How are you? I'm...okay. Really I'm numb. Watching JK concede this afternoon was like a bad dream. It didn't seem real. Earlier today, a girl in my class told me that a little bit of her died today. Exactly. That's how it feels. My dad emailed me this afternoon with his thoughts:

From: Jay Price [mailto:mmri@********.com]
Sent: Wednesday, November 03, 2004 4:39 PM
To: Andy Price
Subject: Re: T Minus One Day

Hello Andy:

I'm feeling more discouraged than I thought I would. I think we have another rough 4 years ahead of us. It seems like I vote on the losing side all of the time. It would be fun to be on the winning side once in a while. Kathie ended up voting pretty much like I did. I feel sorry for John Kerry. He spent the better part of two years on this, every single day.

Take care,

Dad

My dad gets it. I'm so proud to have a dad who is informed and aware and empathetic. If only there were a few more like him, if just in Ohio. :)

So what do we do now? That's been the question my friends have been asking. I think the only thing we CAN do is to continue to seek the truth, keep up with news and world events, write your legislators often, and try, try, try not to let another four years of the Bush revolution defeat us. I know that's not very stirring, but, hey, remember that I am still sort of in shock.

Some other thoughts:

• I had the saddest party last night. The champagne still sits in the fridge, waiting for something celebratory to occur.
• Tonight, I found myself reverting to the safety of my tween years, Adam and the Ants blasting on the stereo, as I drank some of the leftover beer from last night. It worked...for about as long as the CD lasted.
• I have now offically voted for more loser Presidential candidates than winners. Thank goodness for Bill Clinton. I have his two wins in one column and Michael Dukakis, Al Gore, and now John Kerry in the other.
• I find myself already looking ahead. Maybe John McCain can stem the conservative tide in '08. Will the neocons even let him? After all, look what they did to him in '00. And who is the Dem most likely to run? Edwards? Hillary? Obama? Can they all run? Maybe the Dems need a three-headed ticket. :)
• Even though Bush won the popular vote this time, I still think that the elctoral college needs to go. That is really all that should matter. Each vote should count. Simple, really. Why can't we get that done.
  

Okay, so buck up, little campers. We lost, and we lost big. Really big. So big that it makes me want to sell out, to stop killing babies and marrying dudes, and start praying and driving an SUV.

But I like being who I am. And there are still 55,554,114 people, 48%, who voted for Kerry. So I guess it could be worse. And my wonderful home state of Michigan went to Kerry...if just barely. And next time they won't have the opportunity to pick on gays and lesbians as a wedge issue to get out the vote. I think that helped. Because from the looks of it, America hates gays and lesbians. Sheesh. How lame. Hey, I wonder if divorces and spousal abuse will go down now that gay marriage is even less legal that it already was.

Alright, stay tuned, because the next Bush fuckup should happen in three...two...one...

Nicholas Kristof: Living Poor, Voting Rich

People like myself, who witnessed all the lies, deception corruption, war, dirty tricks, etc of the Bush administration are, today, wondering just what went wrong. There will be a lot of theories, but, to me, it's all about values and how Republicans use them, increasingly successfully, to get a majority to vote against their very own interests.

Nicholas Kristof writes about this phenomenon in today's New York Times. You can read it here.

Well...that's the last time I vote

T-Shirt Hell already has a shirt for me (and you).

Promising News from Early Voters

According to Gallup's mega-final-ultra poll out Sunday evening, 30% of registered voters in Florida have already voted, either through early voting or by absentee. Of those who have already voted, Kerry leads President Bush 51% to 43%. According to the Des Moines Register poll out late Saturday evening, 27% of Iowa adults have already voted. And among those Kerry leads 52% to 41%.

Give Bush a Brain Game

Oh man, you will LOVE this! Hours and hours of fun to help get you through the next 24 hours.

My Dream: A Reunited Velvet Underground

Early this morning, I had the most amazing dream. I was in a recording studio, producing The Velvet Underground! Yeah, I know! It was pretty cool. It began with my cell phone ringing and I got on with the other person and said, "Guess where I am right now! I'm in the studio with the Velvet Underground! Lou is here and so is Moe Tucker." I looked around and remembered Doug Yule was there, so I said his name too. I guess even in my dreams, I remember that Sterling Morrison has been dead for nearly ten years now. Oddly, I forgot all about John Cale. Weird. Then hung up with my friend and told Lou Reed that my email address what andysays@whatvever.com, and he thought that was pretty cool. He wasn't at all the curmudgeon that he is in real life. I told him that people very rarely get the VU reference in my email address, but I figured HE would. And we laughed and laughed. Good times.

The Nation: 100 Facts and 1 Opinion: The Non-Arguable Case Against the Bush Administration

I was kind of feeling like there was little point in posting anything more about this election, figuring that I've converted all the people that I'm possibly going to convert. But then I got a batshit crazy email from someone in my English teaching universe, an email that proved to me that there are still those out there who are painfully misinformed and who have very deeply internalized that misinformation.

So for these people, I offer this list of 100 failures of the Bush administration (with source notes!).

But then, anyone who refers to a vote for Kerry as "murderous" is probably beyond hope or help at this point.

The Onion: Republicans Urge Minorities To Get Out And Vote On Nov. 3

Here's an Onion article that is maybe a little TOO close to the truth to actually be considered satire. I mean, Republicans in Louisiana really did do almost exactly what is being described here.

BTW, are the rank and file of the Republican party as disgusted with all their efforts at voter suppression/intimidation/fraud as I am? Just wondering. I mean, what an interesting question to ask your Republican friends. If you have any left at this point. Me, I'm trying not to. It's simply far too great a character flaw for me to excuse.

But then again, with a Kerry victory looking like a very real possibility, I am finding it far easier to be magnanimous to my Republican neighbors. Just yesterday, I was joshing with a guy who lives along my running route, about the vandalism of his Bush sign. But then, he's not a bad guy. Not at all Republican-like. Heh, or he's a really good actor.

A little over 48 more hours from now, we'll be watching the returns come in. I predict a substantial Kerry victory. Someone call CNN! :)